Gwaenchanseumnidaa

Hi :) i know it's been a long time since i've bothered to update but like i've said before, i'm going to try taking this as something that matters again. Well, this time, i hope i find something that keeps me going because i obviously haven't found that inner drive i used to possess. 

This is not going to be surprising but since i've stopped blogging, i completely lost touch of how to string together a simple sentence and to keep the flow of my essays. I think by sections and they come together as a very incoherent piece. It's a shame that as i age, my writing worsens. I wouldn't like to think it's all downhill from here.

Anyway, here comes the same ol' grandma updates of how i have been keeping up with life in Melbourne. It's been like 3 months since the last trip back to Malaysia? God, time passes too slow for me. I've been cave-dwelling. The only people i spend my time with is my brother and his bunch of friends. I guess since June i was officially out of the social circle.

Many times i feel like i've lost myself along this journey. A part of me hopes that i never made this decision of coming to Melbourne but a part of me actually sadistically enjoys the isolation. I can't even remember the last time i saw a friend on purpose, not taking into account the surprising bump-ins on the streets because it's only weird when it doesn't happen.

Melbourne is a freaking small place. There's really no way of escaping reality. I should've thought this through better than i did. Not only did this fail to bring my any benefit, it also destroyed all the things i once held so dear to me back in KL.

I'm a mess.

I guess it's time to wake up

and attend to what i've become.

Thanks SZS for still having faith in me.

Sadly, you're alone.

xx